Animal Writings

It's amazing how many well-read, well-informed, and intelligent people I know who think cows need to be milked—as if cows were non-stop spigots who would get backed up if humans didn't milk them. Do these folks ever wonder how cows got by for millions of years without humans? (The answer is: quite well.)

I hate to sound like a seventh-grade health-ed class, but I have to explain this to people often: Cows lactate for one reason—to feed their calves. A cow produces enough milk for her calf. That's how nature designed her. No human intervention necessary. As the calf grows older, the mother cow's milk production wanes, and the calf is weaned.

Cows produce milk like adult human women produce milk: when they have a baby—not all the time.

On dairy farms—organic, small farm, giant factory farm—cows are turned into machines. We impregnate them long before the age at which they'd have their first calf, because we don't feel like waiting around. (It's all about money.) When the calves are born, we steal them them from their mothers, usually before they're two days old. As you might expect, a baby calf, barely steady on his feet, who's just been taken from his mother, wails. So does his mother, who looks day after day for the offspring she carried in her belly for months and to whom she gave birth. We deny the calf the company of his mother, and the simple joy of nursing at his mother's teat, so that we can have her milk for ourselves. How mean is that? And we don't even need the milk; we take it because we can.

Through intensive breeding, feed additives, and, in most cases, hormones, we coax so much milk out of cows it's profane. The poor cows lose calcium and other minerals, and develop osteoporosis. Half of all dairy cows are lame by the time they're five years old.

Then they're killed. Another myth is that dairy is a non-lethal business. Are you kidding? In some ways it's worse than beef. We kill the cow when her milk production drops below profitable levels—about one-fifth of the way through her normal lifespan—and we kill her male offspring (and eventually all her female offspring).

I assume most, or maybe all people reading this consider themselves to be decent and moral, and basically are. Stealing milk from a baby animal so you can have it is profoundly mean. So is forcing cows—doting, gentle mothers—to have babies so you can take their milk. Come on—we can do better than that. If you haven't tried soy milk in a while, give it a try again. There seems to be a hundred varieties and brands out there now. And they're always getting better. If you're like me and usually have "milk" on cereal, not straight, try soy milk on cereal. Use soy milk instead of cow's milk in mashed potatoes and I doubt you'll be able to tell the difference. You can also buy various flavors of soy creamer for your coffee.

If you're allergic or averse to soy milk, try almond milk or rice milk. Lately almond milk is my main milk product; it's got a nice taste. Rice milk is a little sweeter; it often works well in dessert recipes. You can buy unsweetened versions of all these products, and you can also buy them fortified with calcium, vitamin D, vitamin A, and whatnot. They're worth a try not only for health and taste reasons, but because you're a decent, moral person.

Giving up milk would be a great—and meaningful—New Year's resolution.